The next time there’s an awkward silence, try whispering, “Did you forget your line?”
Then it’s your responsibility to help out anyone when you here them shout that out.
Even if it’s a stranger
Most likely the best post ever.
If you don’t know this rug you didn’t live
We’ve all had that awkward moment where we accidentally touched our friend’s boob
Cards Against Humanity is where you learn which of your friends are basic and which ones are sociopaths there is no in between
Nobody has to deal with americans more than other americans.
I am an american and I can verify that this is indeed true.
#everyone else gets to be annoyed by Americans from afar #while Americans have to be annoyed by other Americans loudly and up close
do you ever wanna talk about a thing but you know you already talk about it too much and your friends are sick of hearing about it so instead you just hold it all inside you and constantly feel like you’re gonna burst?
on a scale of one to ten how ashamed do you think tumblr is to have the same logo font as toddlers and tiaras
did u think i was lying
Guys, btw, this is an actual insult
if he calls your mother a hamster, it indicates that she is a fast-breeding rodent— you can get the insult there
and if he says your father smelt of elderberries, well, wine was primarily made from elderberries in the time of king arthur. he’s calling his dad a drunk
more you know
america is never going to win this war on drugs holy shit
What’s that flying across the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? NO it’s a bag of CRACK COCAINE
a drink just for me
THEY MAKE VODKA NOW?! Bitch Bubbly is one of my favorite sparkling wines.